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Poly...You're Not Even Close, Actually... [Jan. 7th, 2009|02:50 am]

It's times like these:


That I find myself grateful to be a part of a loving, communicating, functioning, semi-open Quad. (And my husband and I are moving in with my boyfriend and his wife this month)
LinkHow many stirs?

Greetings (again) [May. 5th, 2008|09:08 am]
Hello and welcome to all the new faces,

I've been getting an increasing number of people asking to join this fair community, which makes me happy, but it doesn't seem like anyone is posting, which makes me sad.

Remember, it takes a villiage to raise a child and a lot of people to make a community. So, where is everyone?

Come on in, sit yourself down. There's some plush armchairs scattered about the place, or an oversized pillow on the floor if you prefer. We've got tea or coffee and some cold juice over by the play area for the kids.

Make yourself comfortable and let's have a chat. How's your own little polyhousehold, or pre-poly household doing? How are things with your life? Any amusing tidbits to share? What makes you happy about poly? What makes you frustrated? What makes you sad? And, of course, what makes it the coziest lifestyle for you?

Anybody need a pillow or a throw? Come, on, go. Post! Talk! yer crazy varmets, or avast and I'll turn pirate on ye. And that's not pretty, believe me. Awk! Poly want a cozy! Awk! (Sorry, that's me parrot)
Link2 stirs|How many stirs?

Dating Couples [Feb. 28th, 2008|01:46 pm]
This is a topic, in various forms I've been meaning to write on for a while, after someone posted a question to one of the other foruems about "any tips for dating couples?"Read more...Collapse )
LinkHow many stirs?

New Relationship Energy. From the outside looking in [Feb. 27th, 2008|05:57 pm]

[Current Mood |calmcalm]

NRE On the outside looking inCollapse )
Link2 stirs|How many stirs?

Hope You Guys Make It! [Feb. 24th, 2008|03:08 pm]
There's been a bunch of things and topics I've been meaning to get to with this, and I keep getting distracted by life.

I'm going to throw out one of them now, just to try and get the ball rolling and add the others when I can. I realize if I don't start somewhere, regardless of how lame or ill-written a start it seems, this won't go anywhere.

One of the congratulatory phrases I hear bantied about in generally monogomous circumstances is, "Congrats, I hope you guys make it."

I have wondered for six years (since meeting Robin and hearing it a lot) exactly what this phrase means.

How does one guage the sucess of a relationship?

At what point has a couple made it? At what point have they failed?

Is they only way to suceed holding hands together at age 85, as we smile together and face the final sunset?

Especially with poly, a lifelong relationship can not be the only measure of sucess. I would think it has more to do with why the relationship was formed in the first place, whether it had memorable and good aspects to it, and whether it achieved whatever goals were for it.

Someone in a poly foruem long ago commented that when a mono couple divorces after six years, they blaim each other or the relationship they formed. Not the decision to marry, or the decision to be mono. When a poly group disbands after five years, they say you failed because of the lifestyle choices you made.

Even after marrying Robin, I still got the same phrase, or in the context of the marriage. How long do I have to be married to Robin in order to prove my sucess at it?

And is sucess really the right question?

It's interesting that one thing poly forces us to reevaluate is how we chose to quantify relationships. Based not on longevity but on agreements between everyone.

What has been your reaction, do people telling you this phrase if you have? What do you see as the sucess of a relationship? Comments?
Link5 stirs|How many stirs?

(no subject) [Feb. 24th, 2008|03:07 pm]
If you ever have any intention with interacting with another member of the human species at some point in your existance, for the love of God do yourself a favour and read this article:

LinkHow many stirs?

Greetings [Jan. 10th, 2008|02:06 am]
Well, I'm finally ready to offically launch this thing, and I'd like to thank you all who have joined recently.

Let's start to get to know each other. What is your life like? Where are you on your poly journey? What's an average day with your family look like?

How did you hear about this community?

What sorts of things are you interested in chatting about? What do you think we've started to loose sight with on the big boards? Where would you like to see this community go? Questions?

What are your thoughts on the concept of polycozy? Of passively going about our lives, without making a big, dramatic, angsty show all the time. Just gathering those you define as family together.

Do you take coffee, tea or hot chocolate? One lump or two? Sugar, cream, lemon?

Pull up an over stuffed arm chair, and we should have a few throw blankets still left hanging about and let's talk.

Let's start a community for the positive, sane side of poly. Things may not always be perfect, but this crazy weird family and lifestyle is mine...and ours.

Come share with me. Everyone is welcome, even if you identify as monogamous. I believe we all have something we can learn about relationships, if you're open to new ideas and ways of creating and defining family for yourself.
Link4 stirs|How many stirs?

Welcome [Jun. 23rd, 2007|12:32 am]
Welcome to a different kind of poly discussion board. A place where we can talk about all the good things in our lives and lifestyles, where we can share our joys and sorrows.

Welcome to a different form of polyamoury, where life is not a frantic struggle to "score" with as many people as possible, or about collecting partners or experiances. Where life is merely about taking things as they come, and celebrating what you have.

I want to make new friends, meet other passive polys, and talk about our choices and the lives we lead.

I'm 24, married to a wonderful man whose 25 and together we're part of a little trapazoid with another slightly older couple. I share my life and hobbies between two men, and am as content as could be.

I coined "polycozy" after discussing with my boyfriend's wife about how they're "passive polys," if an opportunity arises, they may take it and see where it leads. They don't actively cruise for more partners, they don't have a preset goal of what they need to complete "their family." I'm the first mistress her husband has taken, and they are happy because I fit. But they didn't set out to look for me.

What is your story? How did you come to be the family you are? Or are you still on the journey? Let's pull up some comfy chairs and chat.
Link1 stir|How many stirs?

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